It would be logical to think that being happy most of the time is a blessing. When you're happy, it usually means there is little to worry about, little to stress you out terribly ... just very little in general except happiness. I have come to the realization that happiness is more of a curse sometimes. Here me out here. I see other people that are not happy. They have one problem or another and I try to console them but they know that I have nothing to relate to their situation so they kind of shrug off my interest in consolation as a nice gesture. I feel helpless sometimes because I want to say, "I know what you're going through and you'll pull through" but there are times when I don't know what they are going through. For instance: if there is an issue with parents, I have no idea what that is about. My parents and I have always had a good relationship and so I do not know where to begin with the parent problems. I mean, we've had our generic differences but overall, no problems. It frustrates me that I haven't had problems such as these simple usual problems to give me some leverage in my helping my friends.

Before I continue, let me assure you that I am not trying to be like, "oh, my life is perfect blah blah." No, not at all. I have my own problems, at least one of which not one of my friends has a problem with on their own "playing field" and I have to deal with it alone. Anyway, the point I am interested in conveying is while I'm happy, I am brought down by others who are sad and I feel especially helpless that I cannot give them any help with the issue other than the "it will be OK" line. While I do believe that, I don't know it for sure and they know it when I say it. :: sighs :: hopefully this is reading the way I intend.

So changing subjects, what is my purpose in life? That's something that I have thought of multiple times. I was thinking just last night, "how would the world be different without me?" It's an interesting thought actually. Reminds me of It's a Wonderful Life with James Stewart's character getting to see what life would be like without him. Very interesting. I often reflect on that to wonder if my life would change the town to anything like that. I'm sure not, but that wouldn't surprise me. However, how would Regal be different? How would my friends be? Would they have different friends of their own? Did I introduce people that would otherwise not have met? How about my parents? Would they have kept trying for a child or would they have given up eventually and been just them? Would they have babysat if I wasn't around? I really don't know. Just interesting thoughts that run through my mind. Not meant to be a "depressing" thought or anything. Just curiousity.

Back to the happiness thing, I am now reluctant to post it because I am concerned that people may think I'm trying to talk down people's problems. I am definitely not. I genuinely want to help those that have problems: especially my friends. Furthermore, I want to see all of my friends be happy and it saddens me when they have a problem. Especially one I cannot deal with or do not know about. If a hug could take away any problem, I would be set but alas ... it does not always work.

So onto my life. I went to the gym today and have to leave for class in a few minutes. I woke up at 9 this morning. I am enjoying waking up earlier on my own steam without an alarm clock. It's a nice feeling to have much of my day left. I think I may try to become a morning person by next summer or something ... especially since when I become a teacher I'll be up early every morning.

Welp, on that note, I bid you adieu.